Some days carry joy. Some carry ache. Father’s Day, for many of us, carries both.
It’s a day filled with backyard barbecues, handmade cards, and thank-you messages to the dads who are still here. But for those of us missing ours – it’s also a quiet reminder of the space they once filled and the love that still lingers.
Grief doesn’t ask permission. It just shows up, sometimes as a lump in your throat, sometimes as a memory that stops you mid-step. And on days like today, it can feel especially loud.
My Dad, My Safe Place
My dad was my biggest supporter. He was steady, present, and kind in a way that never made me feel judged. He didn’t have to say a lot – just being around him made me feel grounded. He was my safe person in a world that often felt chaotic.
There’s something irreplaceable about that kind of love. And losing it changes you.
Grief Changes Too
Each year since losing him has brought something new. Year 1 was raw. Year 3 brought unexpected anger. Year 5 felt quieter but just as deep.
Grief doesn’t follow a straight line. It’s not about “moving on” – it’s about moving forward with the love that remains. And I’ve learned that on days like today, it’s okay to feel the ache, but also okay to smile at the memories. You can hold both.
One thing that helps me now is turning my attention toward the dads who are still here. I make it a point to say thank you. To appreciate the good ones. And in doing that, I feel closer to my dad – because he taught me what it means to show up for others.
This year, I also wrote him a note. I tied it to a balloon, whispered what I needed to say, and let it go into the sky. That quiet ritual brought peace I didn’t know I needed. Maybe it will for you too.
If You’re Grieving Today…
You’re not alone. Whether your father was your hero or someone you’re still healing from… your feelings are valid.
Maybe you’re lighting a candle. Maybe you’re scrolling through old pictures. Maybe you’re just getting through the day. That’s enough.
There’s no “right” way to grieve. Only your way. So let today be what it needs to be for you.
And if you need a reminder: love doesn’t disappear. It changes form. It lives on in how you love others, in the lessons you carry, in the way you still whisper their name.
To all the dads, and all the hearts missing one – this day holds space for you.